No money, no hair

They got a message from the action man. When does a spreadsheet become obsolete? A simple one. You know, say, of a DVD collection. Title. Year. Genre. Note. Seems sufficient. No? Sordid details following. I downloaded and installed a 30-day free trial of FileMaker Pro 8.5. I'm looking into a cataloging project for a local collector of old maps. Seemed simple enough. Even for me. Download the trial version, test it a bit, kick the tires, tool around a little. So I undertook to catalog my DVDs. More than a sortable list. Less than fully-cataloged records. No subject access. But actor and director access! Fewer than 20 Alfred Hitchcock films into it, and I was sold. I am buying the full version. I uploaded images of the movie posters into each record. Totally cool! Like way chilly! Oh no, don't say it's true. I must now learn how to customize templates. For the maps, and for my PEZ collection. Well, the dispensers anyway. I simply won't catalog the candy. Especially the grape ones. I see clearly in my mind, catalog records for my PEZ buddies, complete with digital images. I do promise to address the dearth of frivolity, you may recall. I shall not set them up in little dioramas though, as had been suggested by a valuable friend. Though the idea of equipping my Star Wars Pez characters with light sabers and blasters was initially spine-tingling, I'll stick to stark minimalist backgrounds. Besides, I'm nowhere near talented enough to photoshop the light effects. It would look lame. Did I just use "photoshop" as a verb? I did, Dear Reader, I did. Oh no, not again. The little green wheels are following me. Ziggy said so.